Khalif Barkhadle
5 min read5 days ago

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TEN STRANGE BEHAVIOURS ONLY COVERT NARCISSISTS EXHIBIT.
By: Khalif Barkhadle
Digital Journalist
Published On: 22nd June,2024

We all know that narcissism is a personality disorder where people have an inflated sense of self-importance and crave and lack empathy. But covert narcissists take a more sneaky approach to manipulating and controlling others. So, here are ten Strange Behaviors only covert narcissists exhibit, giving us a glimpse into their secret nature and how they affect relationships.

Number 1: Covert narcissists exhibit excessive self-pity.
They love playing the victim to gain sympathy and support. They master the art of presenting themselves as helpless and vulnerable, even when they do not feel that way. By doing this, covert narcissists dodge any blame or criticism that might come their way. It’s a clever way to avoid facing consequences or being held accountable for their actions.

Number 2: Emotional manipulation.
Covert narcissists deeply understand human emotions and how to use them to their advantage. They employ guilt trips to make others feel bad for not meeting their expectations. You might hear them say things like, “If you cared about me, you would do this for me.” Gaslighting is another classic move they pull off. They twist the truth, deny or belittle others’ feelings, and make their victims doubt their reality. This leaves their victims confused, full of self-doubt, and feeling powerless. Covert narcissists exploit the vulnerabilities and insecurities of others, preying on their emotional weaknesses.

Number 3:
Playing the Martyr.
Covert narcissists love to portray themselves as selfless and virtuous to gain recognition and admiration. They make others feel indebted to them by constantly sacrificing and playing the victim. This manipulative tactic ensures that others keep fulfilling their needs and desires while they maintain control. They might exaggerate their sacrifices or guilt-trip others to make them feel responsible for their well-being.

Number 4:
The silent treatment.
The silent treatment is another tool in their manipulative toolbox. Covert narcissists purposely shut down emotionally and refuse to communicate with their victims. This creates an atmosphere of tension, anxiety, and insecurity for the person on the receiving end. The silent treatment is a power play that allows the narcissist to control the situation and the victim. By withholding emotional connection, they use it to punish perceived slights or offenses and reinforce their belief in superiority and control over others.

Number 5:
Boundary violation.
Violation of boundaries is an aggressive behaviour among covert narcissists. They excel at crossing personal boundaries in a way that often goes unnoticed or is hard to detect. Instead of blatantly disregarding boundaries, covert narcissists manipulate situations and people while maintaining a facade of innocence or concern. They might invade someone’s personal space, pry into their private affairs, or delve into sensitive topics without permission. Their subtle approach leaves their victims feeling violated, confused, and unsure of how to respond. It’s challenging for victims to recognize and confront their manipulative behaviour.

Number 6: False humility.
False humility is yet another trait of covert narcissists. They pretend to be modest, unassuming, and humble while secretly seeking admiration and validation from others. Covert narcissists use false humility as a manipulative tactic. They downplay their accomplishments and act like they are not seeking attention or validation. But beneath this humble facade, they still focus on themselves and crave admiration and attention.

Number 7: We have smear campaigns.
When covert narcissists feel threatened or exposed, they launch smear campaigns to protect themselves and maintain control. They aim to tarnish their target’s reputation and manipulate others’ perceptions. During a smear campaign, covert narcissists spread false rumors, engage in gossip, and twist facts or exaggerate their target’s faults.

Number 8: Triangulation.
Covert narcissists often employ a tactic called triangulation to manipulate and control others. They create conflicts or tensions between people by playing them against each other. For example, they might spread rumors or make negative comments about one person to another, causing division and mistrust. By keeping people at odds with each other, covert narcissists maintain a sense of power and control over the situation.

Number 9: Emotional withholding.
Covert narcissists have a knack for emotionally withholding affection, validation, or support from others. They may give the impression that they’re distant, cold, or uninterested in their relationships.
By denying the emotional connection, they manipulate others into seeking their approval and validation, constantly striving to win their affection. This behaviour leaves their victims feeling insecure, constantly yearning for the love and attention deliberately withheld.

Number 10: Love bombing and devaluation.
Covert narcissists often cycle between love bombing and devaluation in their relationships. Initially, they shower their victims with excessive praise, attention, and affection, making them feel special and valued. This phase, known as love bombing, is used to gain control and establish a strong emotional bond. However, once narcissists feel secure in control, they gradually devalue their victims. They may criticize, belittle, or emotionally withdraw from them, causing confusion and emotional pain. This cycle of idealization and devaluation keeps the victims hooked and dependent on the narcissist’s approval, furthering their control over the relationship
So, how do you handle strange behaviours from covert narcissists? Here are our tips. Handling covert narcissists can be challenging, but there are strategies you can employ. Set clear boundaries, stay self-aware, and limit emotional investment. You have to seek support from close friends and family. Communicate assertively, trust your intuition, and consider distancing yourself. Prioritize self-care and seek professional help if necessary. Remember, protecting your well-being is crucial when dealing with covert narcissists.

Understanding these additional behaviours helps us be aware of covert narcissists’ manipulative tactics. By recognizing these signs, we can protect ourselves and maintain healthier relationships built on mutual respect and genuine care. Awareness of these behaviours empowers us to navigate relationships cautiously, protect our emotional well-being, and build connections based on trust, respect, and genuine empathy.
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Khalif Barkhadle

I'M A CONTENT WRITER WITH A PASSION FOR CREATING ENGAGING AND INFORMATIVE CONTENT FOR A WIDE RANGE OF AUDIENCES.